“Ladies and gentlemen, I have been to the Great Wall of China, I have seen the Pyramids of Egypt, I’ve even witnessed a grown man satisfy a camel. But never in all my years as a sportscaster have I witnessed something as improbable, as impossible, as what we’ve witnessed here today!” The father of the baby in Lane 1 touched the baby’s face to bring attention to the lint roller. It seems like an illegal move and grounds for disqualification.